(This video is recorded from a YouTube LIVE session)
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“Subconsciously we believe that if we are overweight we are also lazy, unsexy, stressed out, grumpy, frumpy, masculine, volatile, flat, etc, etc. Now, you may be that way, but that has nothing to do with your weight. ”
I read this article this week from Sarah Jenks after our interview that was talking all about how woman are worried that they are too fat for their partner! And at first when I read it, I was like oh my gosh, that is so sad….. And then it hit me.
I have been super triggered thanks to recent trip to the Halloween store with my boyfriend. Walking down the aisles and having to look at all the sexy costumes and all the sudden I felt super fat.
I started imagining walking into this Halloween party, only to feel like the ugliest woman in the room.
Who has ever been there before?
Those moments when you can’t even enjoy sex because all you’re thinking about is how gross your body looks. Or maybe you never even have sex with the lights on anymore.
Or
If I could just lose weight, then he would love me more.
Then he would give me more attention.
Then he would be kinder.
So let’s slow down and dissect where all this is coming from and what we can do to feel loveable in the skin we are in no matter what we weigh.
3 Issues With this belief “I’m too fat for my partner”
Fat = flawed.
Projection Much.
Body = You.
Ok, so now let’s talk about how to handle these triggers, because I know I am not the only one dealing with this..
3 Ways to Handle This Trigger:
Invite Unconditional Compassion
Ask the Deeper Questions
Address the Root
A Halloween costume does not get to determine my self worth.
My body size does not dictate my loveability.
Feeling confident…. Feeling loveable is inner work.
The number on the scale or the acceptance of my partner cannot give me either of those things.
Because my size does not mean…
I will be loved better.
Or never left.
Or treated with more kindness.
Or desired more.
Or be more confident.
Or have a better relationship.
Or have a better sex life.