THIS OR SOMETHING BETTER.
Y’all, you will probably hear me repeat this phrase over and over again if you hang with me enough. I’m constantly asked to explain to people how to live a life without attachment and begin to approach everything in life with a “this or something better” attitude.
Ultimately, the quality of your life is determined by your expectations and how you attach yourself to those expectations.
So let’s break it down.
Attachment is when you are attached to something happening a certain way. You are clinging to a desired outcome that you think is best. For example, that could look like needing someone to behave in a particular way, or expecting a particular outcome to happen. It is when you are attached to anything happening the way that you think is the best way for it to go.
Bottom line is all too often we attach ourselves to people and things hoping to fill a need within ourselves.
So I’m curious, when have you been the most unhappy or angry or unfulfilled? Briefly picture that experience from a safe distance. Do you think that maybe, just maybe, there is more to that experience than simply what happened? Perhaps it was the attachment to what you thought was going to happen, or what you needed to happen that lead you to feel rejected, helpless, or disappointed?
When we feel attached to the outcome, we are really setting ourselves up for disappoint. Why? Well… we can’t predict the future. There are so many variables at play.
So what I suggest is to move away from attachment to a place of releasing.
A PLACE OF HIGH INVOLVEMENT AND INTENTION, BUT LOW ATTACHMENT.
We can have beautiful intentions of what we want from a situation and project that out to the universe, but always with low attachment. “This or something better for the highest good of all those involved.” So often, we cannot see the whole story. So what we think is best, may not be. So staying open to that belief and recognizing that there may be something even better than what we think is best.
It really beautiful when you can become aware of how you are attaching yourself to things, people, and circumstances in an effort to meet your needs. And you can begin to ask yourself, “What is this attachment really about?” “Why am I clinging to this outcome?” “What security, safety, or reassurance is it giving me?” And then we can begin to ask, “How can I release this attachment and open up to trusting that it will be this or something better?” “How can I tell myself that no matter what the outcome is, I am loved, worthy, and cherished?” And begin to explore how you can meet your own needs without the expectations and the clinging.
Whenever I think about contentment and emotional peace, I picture a wise, beautiful young woman with her hands wide open in front of her. She is not grasping onto anything or reaching out to control her circumstances. She is perfectly present, capable, and open allowing all to flow to her. If I don’t get this, I’ll still be alright. This is happening for me. Her fists are not clinched.
OPEN YOUR FISTS DEAR ONES AND ALLOW THE FLOW OF LIFE TO MOVE TO YOU. COME BACK TO NEUTRALITY, COME BACK TO TRUSTING, COME BACK TO BELIEVING. LIFE IS HERE FOR YOU. THIS OR SOMETHING BETTER.
Check out more on this topic: Check out my Facebook LIVESTREAM called “Exploring Attachment: Wants vs Needs” and don’t forget to “Like” my page!