S2: EP85- 6 Steps To End Self Sabotage

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Show Notes

Join Mary as she wraps up this month’s topic of Self Sabotage. We wanted to wrap up the month with some practical ways to get through self sabotage.

Self sabotage will likely be a recurring theme throughout our lives. As we grow and heal, our self sabotaging patterns will likely shift and change, but might not disappear. The real goal is to be able to recognize them sooner, and deal with them in a healthy way that meets them with understanding.

When we are able to recognize and approach our self sabotaging behaviors with compassion, we can then identify the areas of our life that need understanding and healing. Taking the judgement away helps us see our own patterns much more clearly, and also will help us identify the benefit we get when we sabotage the things we truly desire. We all want to be seen and heard. We need to not only extend this to others, but also ourselves.

When we can take the time to address our emotions, give ourselves what we need, create safety, and write a new story we can begin to see lasting change and create the lives we truly desire! 

6 Steps To End Self Sabotage

1) Notice The Pattern– Without judgement, identify your patterns. List out what self sabotaging behaviors  look  like for  you.

2) Identify the Root– Understand the protection. Ask yourself  “Why did I just do that?” or “Why did I say that out loud?”. Write down those situations in a journal or make a mental note about what happened, and what triggered your response. 

3) Address The Need- Feel Your Emotions. Learn to tolerate the uncomfortable emotions that might come up. When you don’t deny your emotions, you can then give yourself what you really need. 

4) Rewrite The Story – Call upon your future self. We want to supply our brain with a new story that redefines the narratives of what our desired outcomes really mean. 

5) Take Micro Steps –  Make 1% changes. We have to baby step ourselves through it. When we do this we have a much better chance of of being successful at whatever we desire to accomplish. 

6) Practice Self Integrity – When we are in integrity to ourselves we are in alignment, and we don’t need to self sabotage. 


We can’t “cure” self sabotage

Recognizing our self sabotage patterns 

How self sabotage can help us identify things we need to address

Finding appreciation for the parts of ourselves that has been coping

Tolerating the emotions that come from our woundedness

The importance of self compassion 

Rewriting our fear stories to a more liberating truth

How micro steps are the key to lasting change

The 6 steps to end self sabotage

And more!


Each month will be a deep dive into a topic that supports you on your journey to living more fully alive. May’s topic will be on SELF SABOTAGE. 



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